Learning to Love Yourself

I was out of the country last week when Whitney Houston passed away, but heard about it, of course, because she was an international star.  What great talent.  What a tragic life. Adored by millions.  Suffered from a lack of self-acceptance, never thinking she was good enough.  Traveled with an entourage of up to one hundred people, but still felt alone and depressed.  Raised in a good Christian family and loved Jesus, but sadly never quite learned to love herself, even though it was the title to one of her most famous songs.

Judaism's basic daily confession of faith, called the Shema, was repeated by Jesus when asked about the greatest commandment: "Love the Lord your God, with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. And love your neighbor as yourself."  The two commandments actually stress THREE loves - the love of God, the love of neighbor and the love of self.  Many good people manage to do a good job of the first two, but fail miserably at the third. 

Genesis reminds us that God said "Let us make humans in our image ... in our likeness" ... and after doing so declared them all VERY good.  But we forget or don't believe it.  Self-love is not evil or wrong as long as we don't overemphasize it over the other two. As a matter of fact, it's just as important "AS" (Jesus' words, not mine) loving others.   If we take a balanced and moderate approach, it actually helps us be a more complete and functioning person.  And we are just simply loving the same person that God loves.

George Gallup has found out that people with a positive self-image and healthy love of self demonstrate the following qualities:
1.  They have a high moral and ethical sensitivity.
2.  They have a strong sense of family.
3.  They are far more successful in interpersonal relationships.
4.  Their perspective of success is viewed in terms of interpersonal relationships, not in materialistic terms.
5.  They're far more productive on the job.
6.  They are far lower in incidents of chemical addiction.
7.  They are more likely to get involved in their community.
8.  They are far more generous to charitable institutions and gave far more to relief causes.

At Houston's funeral service, Kevin Costner remarked that as she entered Heaven, God could finally tell her that she was "good enough."  Truth is, she was good enough all along.  It's true for all of us. Let's try to remind each other of that ... maybe even daily.